Welcoming A New Age.

Yesterday was my Birthday.

I love birthdays.

A day all in the name of you! That you get to celebrate your life, your accomplishments, your failures, and you literally get your cake and get to eat it too.

This year I celebrated my Birthday with my Boyfriend.

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We started the day by driving to the Napa Valley. California’s famous wine country. It’s funny because I never used to like wine, but over the last year and half I began to appreciate it much more. I found one’s I very much enjoy and thought that this trip would be awesome!

My boyfriend made me a gift basket to take with us so we would have snacks …boy does he know me or what?! He also made sure everything was gluten free! So sweet!

First we went to Mumm Winery in Napa. They are known for their sparkling Wines and Champagne. 

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I got to taste three of their sparkling wines, one of which was created by Carlos Santana. It was actually my favorite one!

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After that we headed into Napa for lunch, it was delicious!
We then drove the pretty country roads over to another winery via the recommendation of the lady that served us at Mumm. It is a castle! The castle was built with materials all shipped here from Europe. There are authentic pieces in the castle from the 1400s and on. The tour was fun, very educational and ended with a delicious tasting!

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After picking up a few bottles of wine, we headed to down town Napa to check into a cute and historic hotel. Thankfully the earthquake that struck did not damage it.

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We then had a lovely dinner and took a stroll along the river. It was An absolutely awesome day!

I appreciated every minute of it, and am thankful for the entire thing. I’m praying that 34 will be an awesome year.

Trail Hog Fail.

Today was Brazen Racing’s Trail Hog trail run. Located at Joseph D. Grant Park at the base of Mt. Hamilton, the trail is know for roaming wild Boar and tarantulas. I participated in this race last year and shocked myself by coming in 3rd place in my age group. But this year, I knew that wouldn’t even be an option, considering I’m not supposed to run.

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When we arrived, it was actually really cold. It felt like a crisp fall morning, which I actually rather enjoyed. It was in stark contrast to last year’s sweltering hot temperatures. This tends to be a smaller race for Brazen, but it seemed that there were more runners this year – so that’s good.

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I (obviously) did the 5k. I started out walking, but it only took about 30 steps from the start line before I contemplated just turning around and not finishing the race at all. Walking hurts. And walking 3.48 miles seemed tedious. (Brazen races are typically slightly longer due to the trails.)

I’ve had a lot of things on my mind this past week, and as much as I’ve tried to process it all – nothing seems to get rid of the anxiety and stress that comes along with the ruminating craziness that has plagued me for the last few days. Once the thoughts of quiting entered my mind, I started to get pretty upset and my eyes began to tear up. The start of the race was pretty much a bottleneck due to all the new 5k runners that don’t really understand trail running no matter how much instruction Sam gives them.  With silent tears falling down my cheeks…I started to feel claustrophobic both mentally and physically…being trapped by both a swarm of bodies and a ton of thoughts. My walk, turned into a jog…which turned into a run.

I was doing what I do best.

I was running from it all.

Trying to find open space both on the trail and in my head, collectively.

Running, oddly enough, hurts less than walking. It is when I stop that I feel the pain from the pounding and stress of running. And the regret for not listening to the PT.

I eventually caught up to my sister, and slowed to a walk only because I knew that I wasn’t supposed to be running. I continued with a walk jog combo till the finish line.

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I still have a ton on my mind. My 3.48 miles wasn’t enough for me to feel better by any means. But at least during the 45ish minutes that I spent on the dusty trails, I felt free from the burdens that I’ve been carrying this week.

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We ended the race by talking with some Brazen Friends, eating watermelon and the insides of an it’s-it ice cream, and taking photos. We then headed over the hill to Santa Cruz to go to Woodstocks Pizza. It was part of my pre-birthday celebration. I had the Sriracha-cha pizza, with pineapple, bacon, green onions and sriracha sauce. It was delish!

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Even though its getting a little harder – the brazen streak continues.

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Finally…a diagnosis and a sentence.

Today I went to my first physical therapy appointment. It’s really been a long time coming. After months of complaining to my doctor, actually switching doctors, and many xrays and MRIs – without any true diagnosis to go along with my pain, I walked into the therapists office…

Where she looked down and with wide eyes said, “oh my gosh. Look at your foot! Take off your shoe please.” Immediately she could see how swollen my foot was and how much it was basically just falling in, and how tender it was.

Posterior Tibial Tendon Dysfunction.

It has a name.

On top of that…she agreed with my doctor, that the injury likely started in the low back/hip and just created a chain reaction all the way down.

My low back is curved in a great deal, which is most likely caused by my excessive hours of sitting at work. 10-12 hours a day has caused muscles to weaken, my glutial muscles have weakened as well. This caused the hip issue.

My whole left side is significantly weaker than the right. It is also very tight, and not very flexible.

So I was given a set of exercises to do, and currently a 3 week plan/outlook. And I was also told absolutely no weightbearing exercises at all. I’m limited to the bicycle and swimming. Except I do not currently have access to a pool. So…that just shortened my list.

No running. Which includes the Rock and Roll half marathon I have on 10/5.

:( :( :(

I am currently trying to figure out what to do as far as my streak goes with Brazen.

I’m going to have to focus on weight training for now, and stretching.

Well. To be honest…I’m still processing this. I have some anger because I’ve been complaining for so long…if I had been given the chance to start PT earlier, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

I’m upset that I cannot run.

And I’ve had the worst headache all day long.

So that’s the update I have for you all now.

Sundays Are My Favorite Days.

I love Sundays. I say that all the time. There’s just something about Sunday’s that makes them so peaceful. Except today. Today, when I woke up I was kind of in a Sunday funk.

I really didn’t feel like doing anything.

At all.

But the scale is going up, and I do not want that to happen. Plus I feel like part of my Sunday Blues is based on the fact that I haven’t worked out for a week. My body is missing all those happy endorphins it’s so used to generating on a daily basis.

I forced myself into the shower (because don’t you take a pre-gym shower too?) And headed to the gym. Really…I didn’t want to be there and just had negative thoughts flying through my head as I entered the doors.

Thankfully Sundays are always relatively empty at the gym. I like that. I started out on the stairs of death and sweated, heaved and heavily breathed my way though 35 minutes of torture. I headed over to the bike and did 25 minutes on “random” level 10. Then I made my way over to the weight room and focused on some leg stuff. I can really feel how much weaker my left side has become, so I actually did extra sets on that side.

I perused the gym for a few minutes after that. Slowly circling the area where all the empty treadmills just sat….calling to me. I started out with a walk, and slowly increased my speed. I totalled 15 minutes and slightly over a mile. I felt some pain when running. But the most pain comes as soon as I stop. :(
But before stopping…I was truly having the greatest time jogging on the treadmill.
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Yes….I said…

Jogging.

On the treadmill.

It was the best mile ever. Only because it’s the only mile I’ve done in 2 weeks.

I’ll take it.

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My excited "i counting that jog as a run" face

After I was done and covered in sweat, I did feel a little better. I’m hoping this week I am able to stick to a better routine.

I’m also hoping the physical therapist can give me more direction on what to do to make my recovery faster.

I headed to the salon today too. Refreshed my color and my cut. It feels better now.
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Happy Sunday people.

Insert Sad Face Here.

Another week has passed and since I last updated you, I have pretty much done nothing active. It’s partly because I had another very busy week. And partly because I’m just really lacking the motivation I need to get my lazy ass off the couch.

I did manage to make it to the gym on Tuesday where I did a quick session on the stairs. But that’s the extent of my fitness for the week.

My hip/ankle is still hurting but thankfully I start physical therapy on Tuesday. I’m really hoping this will help me get back on the right track.

I’ve contemplated going for a short run tomorrow, but I’m really not sure.

I believe next week will be less busy, so I’m going to try to be consistent with my workouts and my food. I’m really not sure why I’ve taken a few steps back. Things in my life are going well, so it’s a little confusing.

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I miss running.

:(

Weekend Rockin’ and Rollin.

Happy Sunday bloggers.

This has been one of those weekends that was so busy, it really didn’t feel like a weekend at all.

It started out with me working more overtime on Saturday morning. I had a really hard time waking up and an even harder time starting working. Instead of 6-10am I ended up working 8-1230. Then I had to clean up my seriously overgrown backyard. It’s been about 3 months since I’ve been back there. The jungle that took over was pretty amazing actually. At least I can ignore it for another 3 months now. Haha! After that I washed my car…by the time I was done, I barely had enough time to eat something and head out with my friend to the Rascall Flats Concert.

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Concert time!

Sheryl Crow was also there, and I have to admit – I was more excited to see her than anything. She’s so awesome! I didn’t get home until after 1230, and tried to get to sleep.

Until 3:22am when I awoke to a strange noise, and a motion that was like being on a boat in turbulent waters! I was totally confused for the loooong 15 seconds of shaking and my cats flying off the bed. All my medals were shaking and jangling and sounded like a ginormous wave was coming. Then my bed started rolling and I thought to myself, “why do I feel like I’m on a boat?”

There was an earthquake at American Canyon, which is roughly an hour and a half or so away. But at a magnitude of 6.1 – it was felt all over the bay area!

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I stayed awake for a while, but got a little more sleep before it was time to wake up at 530.

Plans were to do a 7 mile long run with my sister….

Except I can’t run.

So, I paced her on a bicycle.

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Let me tell you….

It made me miss running even more.

I still had fun over all. But I wished I could be running along side my sister instead of wobbling and almost falling riding next to her.

Oh well. When you can hardly walk…running is not gonna happen. I’m hoping physical therapy will help.

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I wish Mr. Cosby. I wish.

Another Busy Week…

This last week was so busy, it just seemed to fly by. On Monday, I chose to rest because my ankle was just not happy. Icing is helping a little but not as much as I had hoped. It’s so aggravating because I have no idea why or how it even got injured! On Tuesday I attempted to do a 30 minute circuit at home. It was going well until I tried to do a cross-country ski lungey thing and landed on my foot incorrectly. Oh well. At least I got 30 minutes in, right? On Wednesday I hit the gym during lunch and managed 35 minutes in the stairs of death.

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I had to go slow, but increased the speed over time to less than fast. 
On Thursday I went to the doctor to have my ankle xrayed because the pain just doesn’t get better. After, I went to the gym and did the stairs again.

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This is probably why it’s not getting better.  The X-ray read as normal, so it’s not a bone injury. I’m supposed to start physical therapy on September 2nd, so hopefully it will help. 

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Today I chose to rest. And ice. And ice some more.

This weekend will be a busy one, but plans are in place to attempt to stay on track with training while still adhering to Dr’s orders of no running.

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Not running is a lemon in my book.

The plus side is that since Monday I’ve done much better with my food and stuff. So that’s a win for the week.

Enjoy your weekend. If you’re running – I’m jealous of you.

When everyone else gets to train…and you’re just sitting there icing.

I’m supposed to do yoga today. But last week when I did yoga, standing in the poses and even sitting with my foot flexed hurt too much. After not being able to walk to well all day yesterday, I decided just to ice today.

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But for some reason I totally went on some crazy food binge. My weight has been going up, and this does not help my hip/ankle pain at all.

I’m going to accept that I messed up today when it comes to food, and try again tomorrow. Tomorrow…will be more like a detox.

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How I feel...

Bear Creek 10k

I couldn’t really think of a fun title for this post. So, I kept it basic and to the point… On Saturday I participated in another Brazen Race!

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Held at Briones Regional Park, the race is part of the Ultra Series due to it’s longer than normal race lengths and intense elevation. I was originally signed up for the 5k because this is one of the few Brazen Races I’ve never done before. But my training plan called for 6 this week. I’m still attempting to stick to my training schedule as much as possible, even though I’m having to alter a lot of things due to recent (medical) events. So, I decided to upgrade to the 10k. 6.3 miles of trails and 1300 feet of climbing in the first 2.5 miles…not so bad, right?!

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The weather was favorable, with overcast and foggy skies at the start of the race. It did feel slightly muggy and humid, but it wasn’t too bad.

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Unfortunately this race was one of THOSE races. From the get go, I just was not feeling up to it. The night before I had a terrible time trying to get to sleep. I was awake till 1am and the alarm went off at 430.

My whole body felt tired, achy and like lead. I felt totally dehydrated and just completely off of my game. My ankle was not prepared to run…at all. The miles were slow, painful, and frustrating – but there was a bright side. I got to run the race with my sister. And also, the trail and views were awesome.

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I managed to pull in my worst 10k time ever…but that’s okay. 1:44:12 will be the time to beat next time around. :/

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I found this on the trail...

I’m just happy that I made it across another finish line. The Brazen streak continues!

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We couldn’t stay long after the race because I had to rush home in order to make it to my friends baby shower in time. It was fun celebrating with friends and enjoying the day.

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I was on my feet a lot because I was helping at the shower. By the time I got home, I was in tears due to the pain from my ankle. I iced it and literally crawled in bed by 7pm. By 730, I was asleep. I really needed the rest. When I woke up this morning my ankle had stiffened up so much that I was unable to bear weight on it. It was a rough Sunday, but I managed to get all the things I needed to accomplish done.
I’m not really ready for another Monday, but

oh well.

Enjoy another week readers!

The dumbest day. Ever.

Today has pretty much been the dumbest day that I’ve had in a very long time.

It started when I woke up feeling super yucky. My migraine was still lingering from the weekend…I hate that.

Then I started work at 6am but my computer was running very slowly. So annoying.

I went to my new doctor today. I was kind of shocked when he walked in, because he was a total hottie. It made me a tiny bit nervous actually. Aside from that he was very nice and unlike my previous doctor, very thourough. I was also examined by a medical student so it was like a 2 for 1. I was in the room discussing things for an hour! It was very beneficial to talk to a doctor who runs as well.

Thankfully he felt that physical therapy will benefit me. (My previous doctor felt it would be a waste of my time.)

After reviewing the xray and MRI, and after bending and poking at everything – it was determined that thankfully this is not bone related. It’s not IT Band, or runners knee, or pirifomis syndrome, or any of the other common running injuries. He feels that I may have injured my hip early in the year and due to my heavy race schedule and continued running, it never fully healed. Because I’m compensating for my hip pain, my knee and ankle are taking the brunt of that…and now my whole left side is effed up. He feels I actually have lower back issues that is most likely contributing to the hip issue.

Scoliosis…which is causing the degenerative disc disease in my lower back. Which, he said high impact exercises like running, doesn’t help.

He encouraged me to consider not running for an extended period of time. He said swimming would be the best thing for me.

He told me to stop signing up for races (he is aware I’m signed up through May of 2015) and to work on building core strength and other things for a while.

He never actually said I had to stop running forever.  But he encouraged non-weightbearing exercises so much that I just felt like he was trying to covert me or something.

I get back to work and deal with extended hours and a computer that refused to work.

I was feeling so bummed by the time I got off work…but I headed to the gym anyway. I had 4 miles scheduled for today. I ended up doing 35 minutes on the bike which turned into 8 miles. Then I did 2 miles on the treadmill.

It was okay.

Except my iPod broke. Is that a sign?

Ugh.

I’m so ready for this day to be over. I will let this all sink in and figure something out later.